i feel like god doesnt love me as much as other people i know now that i have only a small hope i remember that jacob god loved but esau he hated i dont have the blessings others have and god doesnt really show the favor kindness or tender mercies i spent the last hour asking him to bless me but if im an esau and his love for me is less than others no blessing on earth could make up for it im hurting and i dont have a word i feel like gods just waiting till i die , my name is kelly and i used to play basketball im a cook at an italian restaurant im poor , im part hispanic i have a nice sense of humor sometimes i feel ugly sometimes i think just the opposite im all alone . im a new orleans saints fan i always wanted to go to college . i have 3 children i dont get to see. i love to travel but not on a shoestring my favorite preacher is td jakes im a nice person i think i think im smart too not sure the last couple of years have been confusing.i used to work in the oil and gas industry. my dad used to sexually abuse me i have to live in that home now i used to play tennis i love people but am shunned avoided and hated i am heartbroken and alone. i dont know if god cares i just feel my chances of turning it around are better if i reach out and try well i saved a cat the other day in the middle of a busy strea half jewish man threatend to stab me for my witness pretty cool huh?and i want to die becaause all i know is pain and dissapointment i wanna be forgiven and live in heaven though but i think ill probably go to hell i always think i have blasphemed the holy spirit ans feel damned people revrn tell me that im sorry so long i have no one who cares and no one to talk to

man i feel really bed here,s my situation i cant make since of it 3 years ago i was delivered from a methadone addiction shortly after that i was healed of a brain tumor by jesus that i didnt know i had. i felt so bad like i was so beyond god s reach and i still dont know was i in sin?i just knew i felt better here it is 3 years later im healed of a brain tumor but im saddled with one of those bodies that are riddled with pain and feel guilty for seeking medicinne(a lot weaker than the methadone i had while on a brain tumor but only narcotic painkillers help) my best friend calls me a junky and i have a broken heart i cant find a dr to help me and i feel as if god may not approve i gave them up for god but i didnt know the extent of my illness their is no more painful or serious an illness as a brain tumor i feel condemned dr ,s havent figured uot what it ids this time around but i could use some relief and some peace and reassurance from god i wish my life hadnt turned out like this but god if your listening i still believe in you please help me if god doesnt heal me id just like to be forgive n know prosperity and freedom and peace the devil has attacked nonstop since i fell on my knees please help me god i need your love and favor i you be silent i might as well give up and die also please lift up my mental state i have very bad mood swings ansd even lash out at god ive started to lose hope thank you very much if you read all this please have compassion

name is kelly and i just went to work for a small family owned italian restaurant and i gave my word id lift it up the owners are very nice christian people and their names are the guidrys . the retaurants name is cioa bella please ask god to bless keep guide and show favor to the business and to use it as a ministry thank you all so very much god bless you all -kelly

i watch everyone get blessed . when i get a meager blessing i always get it taken away . im 29 and ive never been established. i have kids i never get to see bills i can never pay and holes in my soul i can never fill people keep telling me to read the word? *&$#@!!!!! i have one of the elders of my church reads 5 minutes a day thats it ?prospers and is blessed i got told to read 1 hr to a 1/2 hr no blessing just more attacks ? please ask god to be kind to me i want to hurt myself and see no way out the more angry i get the calmer and colder he seems to become i know ther is life outside of what ive been expieriencing i know it i can see those in the land of the living from my misery please i always thought id do something great with my life but god has cursed me and i tried to do the right thing of cuorse i made mistakes but i dont want to be poor lonely and afraid of spiritual bad things happening from either side any more please im so hurt and want to do good things in life please let me go so i can make something of myself ive almost worked myself into the grave and god laughs at me the harder i work the less favor he shows me please ask god to be kind to me . i dont know what else to do?anymore

father please give my brother increase god and guide himin the way he should go please give him work in you lord jesus (because i personally would rather sweep up trash after a rheinhard bohnke crusade than preach to deaf ears )so please soften the hearts of those around him and remind him that a prophet is only without honor is his own home and in his own land and may god bless and keep you and may you bear fruit in season and may god do exceedingly and abundantly above all we can hope or think to imagine and in jesus name lord please spare the family amen

hello every one my names kelly and im 29 i have 3 kids and i cant take care of them or myself and i feel god judges me for this ive never personally been established and my lifes pretty hopeless im $50,000 in debt and im supposed to pay child support of $500 a month i dropped out of college 3 times in the last 3 years and never even really get started icant seem to make friends on my jobs and enemies come easily all of which god give the victory over me too . i dont even think he forgave my sins i always feel when i get mad that he allows them before his eyes . i dont know what to do i need god to help me and he always seems to favor all the others over me and its heartbreaking and gutwrenching but now if he doesnt want to show me love favor and kindness maybe hell just give me money and protection like jabez it hurts me so much to ask for a jabez blessing but all other requests have been delayed and denied please ask god to bless me -kelly

hello my name is kelly and im 29 my life is a mess and i feel like a loser i cant ever seem to get it together and eat more rejection than i do food i have more tears mingled in my drink than drink . im single and really want some to love but im poor and cant seem to prosper or be established financially, im not walking in health, vary very alone and im opressed with spirits of guilt that are destroying my body along with heaviness and sadness sometimes i think im a bad person or a false prophet and i see all this damning evidence to support it and its all i can do to hang on . i miss my children and have never met my son and i was sexually abused as a kid and a teen. i feel sometimes that because of generational curses i cant see my kids , that im fighting god a fight i dont really need . like i said a mess lost all my family when i revealed the abuse and ive played the fool my whole life i am hurt and tired.where is my friend ? the one who carried me through all this that promises better things and peace with life eternal i really need help so thank you whoever you are i can use any blessing at all . kelly